No Solace at the Bottom of a Bottle (Calista)

[Jin Shidehara]

Everyone was gone. They'd all left, long ago. They had things to do, repairs to make, lives to cherish. But he was still there. Jin was still there. He had been kneeling on the beach for...something close to an hour now. He felt the rough sand against his knees, the cool ocean air brushing against his cheek, but none of it registered with him. His eyes were fixed on the water, specifically the myriad pinpricks of light on the horizon. They were the last of some of the closest, greatest friends he had ever had. Bridget...Ash...even Chandler...they were all gone. He was numb. He didn't know what to think, what to feel. Those tiny, flickering orange lights floating away from him...they were some of the only attachments he had EVER made. The sand around his knees was wet in places, splotched from tears that had been steadily falling from his eyes. HIM. Crying. Fucking bullshit is what it was. As the lights finally disappeared over the horizon, he pushed himself up to one knee. "I swear...never again...I'm gonna find us a way out of here...I swear it..." He couldn't stay here anymore.

Several moments later found him emerging from the forest at a jog; his breath coming faster, sweat beading on his brow as he turned towards the West Tower. Calista...she would need support now more than ever. He'd promised her he would be there...and he wasn't going to go back on that now. He breathed deeply, letting out the air in a whoosh. This was all new to him. Comfort, support...he barely knew anything about it. It didn't help that, frankly, he'd been in-...he sighed. Now wasn't the time for that. As much as the loss was hurting him, he knew it must have been hurting her so much worse. With another deep breath he slowed to a walk as he reached to tower, entering and making his way past students as blank faced and weary looking as he himself. He looked down, keeping his face hidden from them. The last thing that they needed right now was to see a leading member torn up. At last he reached her room, lifting his fist up, hesitating for a moment before knocking at her door. "Cali...?"

[Calista Leila Rosa]

Calista had been one of the first to leave the vigil, despite her being the one to organize it all. Something inside her had wanted to believe it wasn't real, that it was all a horrid nightmare. That any minute she'd wake up and find that Bridget, Chandler, Ashton, Meredith...that they were all alive and well. That her mind was playing cruel jokes on her. They were gone. Her best friends, her sister. They were gone.

Calista's eyes were red, her fae puffy from crying. As soon as the service was over, as the lights began to head off into the distance, she retreated into her room and locked the door. She refused to let any of them see her like this. It would just make things worse. She wouldn't let them see their leader being so...weak. But, she was weak. She knew she was. If she wasn't, this never would have happened. Her friends, her family was dead.

A cabinet in her room was open revealing a full stock of alcohol, most of it was confiscated. Calista would never admit it, but at times when her stress level was too high, she had gotten into the bad habit of drinking to take the edge off. This was one of those times. Calista's body processesed alcohol differently than most people, it was much faster, which meant she got drunk extremely easily.

She would need to put their pictures up on the wall, the wall of those lost in battle. It was something she looked at when she needed inspiration, something to push her even farther. Their deaths wouldn't be in vain. She'd make sure of it. She picked up the bottle, placing it to her lips. As she tipped it, she took a long drink, feeling the sensation as it went down her throat. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, a bitter smile appearing on her face.

There was someone at the door.

"Come in!" she called, followed by a small hiccup.

[Jin Shidehara]

Jin sighed heavily on the other side of the door as he waited for a response. What was he gonna do? What could he say? The more he thought about it, there was really nothing to say. They had lost so much in so short a time. Maybe now was just the time to get drunk and forget. Certainly seemed like it to him. Ironically, Cali seemed to have had the same thought as he had; he heard the hiccup at the end of her words as she asked who it was from inside the room. He knew he should probably be worried, and in the back of his mind, he was. But he understood. Right now...he didn't want to think either. He wished he could stop seeing their faces, hearing their voices in his head. Maybe it wouldn't hurt...just for one night... With another light sigh he spoke out, resting his forehead against the door lightly. "It's um..." he cleared his throat, his actual voice still close to cracking from the funeral if he spoke more than a few words at a time. "It's Jin."

He didn't know what would happen next, but he had told Cali he would be there. That he'd always be there. So, if she needed a drinking buddy for the night, he was more than able to fill that position. Willing and able, though he was really trying not to think about that right now. It was just his way. When feelings started to overwhelm him, he shoved them down and replaced them with cynicism. Well...that or alcohol. Or pain meds. With a deep breath he turned the handle, pushed the door open and came into the room, nudging the door behind him closed with his foot. The room smelled of alcohol, and the first thing his eyes alighted on was the open liquor cabinet, various spirits lining its shelves. His eyes then landed on Cali, who had clearly been crying just as he had, both their eyes showing the telltale signs: redness, puffiness, a glossed over look. Yup...this was going to be an interesting night. "Hey there...," he walked further in, brushing a hand through his bangs absently. "How ya-," he caught himself again, forcing his emotions down and clenching a fist. "How ya holding up...?"

[Calista Leila Rosa]

Calista eyes were drawn to her charm bracelet. There were already 5 charms placed on it. At one point, each charm represented someone she loved. Now, it represented those she loved and lost. She twisted it absently around her wrist. It was the last thing that Bridget had ever given her. Her surprise birthday party. Closing her eyes, her room was still haunted by the memory. Still haunted by their smiles. Her two best friends. Laughing as they joked and threw pillows at one another, enjoying life. It was a time when everything seemed so hopeful, so bright. She had felt like...things were going well in her life. Light had just come back into her life, smiles had seemed so much more common. Now, now that was gone. Her light had been smothered, leaving nothing but cold darkness in its wake.

She wiped at her eyes again, taking another sip. She just wanted to forget, she wanted it all to go away. She wanted to stay in her memories. Moving on was a concept she was all too familiar with, but in that moment, it was foreign. She didn't want to move on, she didn't want to be strong. Her best friends, her family was dead and all she wanted was to curl up and mourn. She never had that luxury. She had to be strong for all those remained, a beacon of hope and of promise. Their future, their dream, it all rested on her shoulders. It was a heavy burden to bear.

As Jin entered her room, Calista turned dark, heavy eyes to meet his gold ones. She took another swig and smiled bitterly.

"oh, just wonderfully." She said, punctuating her sentence with another hiccup. Her eyes glossed him over. "...you look terrible. You want some?" She asked, gesturing to the cabinet.

"Drinking alone -hic- is definitely not as fun." The teasing smile on her face was empty, meaningless. A shell. Something brought on by the alcohol in her system. As she downed nearly the rest of the bottle, she frowned a bit.


"C-Can you grab me another? Any will do...the -hic- stronger the better" For once, Calista didn't want to be strong, she didn't want to put aside her emotions for the greater good. All she wanted was to forget, to let her mind blank. If she had to go through her entire liquor cabinet to do that. Then so be it.

[Jin Shidehara]

Jin stood and listened to her, his eyes still somewhat glossed over. He thought for a moment about arguing. About telling her not to drink, that now wasn't the time, but...wasn't it? With all the people dead...all the friends gone, there was no time better to just...stop thinking. Jin, for one, was tired of crying. Tired of sobbing till his throat hurt. Tired of eyes so bleary he couldn't even see. Tired of his chest...feeling like it was being torn in two. He realized, looking at Cali, that he wanted nothing more than to...forget for a while. And there was no one he would want to do that with more than Calista Rosa. The last of his inhibitions fading he allowed his face to slip into the confident smirk it usually wore, though it and his cocky tone were both little more than thin facades, and walked over, reaching for a bottle of tequila towards the top of the cabinet. "Yeah...why the hell not? Nobody should drink alone."

Popping the top on it he stared at the silvery clear liquid for a few moments, before lifting it a bit. "Here's to the people that are gone. Save a spot for me in hell, guys." With a bitter smile on his face he tipped the bottle to his lips and took a large swig, feeling the alcohol burn its way down his throat. He closed his eyes and let it carry away his cares as a warm feeling spread through his stomach, to his chest, and then his head. He let out a laugh, though it was more a mockery of real laughter than anything else, and blinked. "Oh god that's good." He handed the bottle to Cali, taking the opportunity to look her up and down for a moment.

He had never seen her so vulnerable before. She looked...utterly alone, and lost. He understood. Jin had never been one to make connections with anybody, but he had done so with these people. And now that they were gone...he felt like there was a hole in part of his being. Like something was missing. Something he knew he would never get back. He would never say it out loud but...he would give anything to see that look off her face. He would give even more to see a genuine smile in its place. Maybe alcohol couldn't do it. But then again...for now...maybe it could.

[Calista Leila Rosa]

She couldn't be this weak, she couldn't afford it. Couldn't believe it. She just couldn't. Yet here she was. vulnerable. empty. Her passion, her drive had flickered away with the corpses of her friends. What was the point. What was the point, anymore!? Her family was dead, gone. Her reason for fighting, her reason for smiling. They were gone.

She was sick of this crushing feeling, the feeling of her heart wilting, tired of the pins and needles tingling through her, the only sensation in an otherwise numbed mind and body. She waited impatiently for Jin to hand her the bottle. Sobriety was always around the corner for her, if she wanted to uphold the wonderful, light headed feeling, she would need to keep drinking.

Taking the bottle from him, she touched it to her lips. In the moment, she took the opprotunity to look at Jin, to really look at him. She had known Jin for quite a while now. He was dedicated, strong, but now it was as if he was made of glass and someone had thrown a rock at him. Broken. His outer personality was cracking. Calista could see it, as it was exactly what was happening to herself. She poured the tequila into her mouth, the sensation of it burning its way down her throat distracting her from her thoughts. Perfect.

"Of course it is, I only keep the good stuff..." She said, slumping back in her chair. Calista's image was near opposite to her usual put-together, never slouching, self. For once, Calista wanted to put aside the person she 'should be'. Life, life was short.

Calista nearly downed the rest of the bottle, seeming to drown herself in alcohol. As her thoughts began to blur, Calista stared at Jin and something occured to her. A deep, natural instinct. A feeling that pushed her up out of her chair and towards the amber eyed male. She wanted to be comforted.

"Mm...why haven't we done this before..." She asked, stumbling slightly as she made her way around and leaned against her desk.

[Jin Shidehara]

Jin could feel the alcohol starting to get to him. His tolerance was high, after all 17 or not, he had been drinking for...quite a while now. But downing nearly half a bottle of tequila in one go would give anyone a serious buzz, and Jin was no exception. He felt his head go fuzzy as Cali sauntered around the desk, leaning back against it and asking something Jin had wished a hundred times over that she would ask. He knew it was probably the alcohol talking and not her but...maybe it wasn't. He dared to hope, even as the alcohol wiped away the last of his inhibitions and he moved closer to her, stumbling very slightly himself. No more thinking tonight.

Calista looked as if she needed comforting...perhaps wanted it...and if he was good for nothing else, he would damn well do that. He rested a hand on either side of the desk next to her, leaning teasingly close for a moment. "Mm, I dunno...we both work way too much?~" His voice was a bit looser now, more unburdened as the alcohol brought its false comfort, and carrying the unfettered note of honesty inebriation often brought to even the most hard-faced. Just before their noses touched he spun away, leaning against the desk next to her, reaching over and taking the bottle off the desk, finishing what was left in it and staring at the empty glass container before setting it back on the desk and walking back over to the cabinet.

He selected a bottle of rum this time, unscrewing the top as he turned to look at Calista, a cocky if still fragile smile spreading across his face. "Maybe we should make more time for...fun."

[Calista Leila Rosa]

"Hell yes we do."She replied. All her life, Calista had put business first, her mission, her vindications. Never once had she put herself before anyone else, let herself enjoy and be a teenager for once. Maybe it was time she changed that.

Calista's dark eyes beckoned the boy near her, biting down on her bottom lip ever so slightly as the alcohol worked its magic, weaving a shield around Calista's mind and heart to keep away the pain that stabbed into her. It may have been temporary, but the reprieve was a welcome on and at the moment, there was no one else in the world she wanted to share this elevated state of mind with. A sober Calista would chastise herself for being so weak, but all she could think about was finding a way to forget about her pain and as she stared into Jin's amber eyes, the way looked even more tempting.

As he stepped closer to her, Calista raised a hand, brushing fingertips along his jaw in the ghost of a touch, teasing, tempting him. She wanted warmth, comfort, even if it came to her in a alcohol induced stupor. She didn't care anymore, she just didn't care.

The faint lines of a pout tugged at her lips as he suddenly tore away from her. Watching him carefully she walked over, a hazy mix of grief and drunken desire in her midnight blue eyees. She took the bottle from his hand, sipping its contents before putting it down, her voice practically a purr.

"Before....all we talked was business...maybe its time we threw some pleasure into the mix...we deserve as much." She said, leaning so close to him that they'd be able to feel another's breath.

[Jin Shidehara]

Jin's world spun a bit as she sauntered to him, meeting his eyes as she took the bottle from him before speaking. He bit down on his bottom lip as she leaned in close, close enough that he could feel her breath warm against his skin, close enough that he could see deep into those blue-black pools that were her eyes; usually so full of focus and determination, now looking more sad, with a hunger he had never seen in them before. And certainly not for him.

He felt the last bit of his doubt retreat from him, his heart pounding in his chest. In a sober state, this was certainly not the way he would have preferred this to happen. But at the same time, maybe this was the only way it *could* happen. Maybe it took them lowering their defenses. Maybe this was right. Slowly he brought up a hand and brushed her cheek in a ghost of a touch, mirroring her action a moment earlier. Moving forward, he gently pushed her hair behind her ear, leaning into her and slowly pressing his lips against hers, his head going fuzzy the second they touched.

Several things flashed through his head as he deepened the kiss, his arms going around her waist. He'd been with several girls since coming to the island, but nothing had ever felt quite as...right as the kiss he was engaged in now. They seemed to fit perfectly together like two puzzle pieces, her lips warm and inviting, his hand fitting perfectly against the small of her back. When he pulled back ever so slightly a moment later, his breath was heavy, his eyes lit up with the same desire found in hers. He just barely parted his lips, as if to say something, but he couldn't make the words come at first, his skin going hot and begging for another kiss, another touch of her skin.

Finally he made two words come out. "Cali, I..."